My daughter, deafness and me
Hmmmmmmm, I wonder what you'll think of this?
Link to programme
So, I watched the above programme this morning and found it very thought provoking. I'll just put up a load of bullet points as my thoughts are rather sleep deprived at the moment!
1 - The most telling part of the programme for me was when her daughter got up and left the signing session, went and sat down and stuck her head in her hands. Guessing she really didn't enjoy having something shoved in her face and being confronted with someone who communicates in a way that is totally unfamiliar and scary. That made me think "hang on, she's not stupid, she knows she struggles" - and so when Rita met with the mother who explained about communication breakdowns it clicked into place. The little girl, at the age of five, has already developed a front - glossing over misunderstandings and distracting people with her 'all singing all dancing' nature. I think it was a shock for her mum to realise this. How sad to think that they couldn't see, but then the hearing mum they met put it well when she said 'if they talk, they're fine' as a common misconception.
2 - Totally empathised with the daughter's tiredness - I used to fall asleep after school regularly such was the exhaustion of having to focus and having those annoying TAs telling me to 'listen,' or 'you're not listening, look at the teacher.' Merde. The tantrums, also a feature of my childhood, I think I was a very angry child - always railing against the world in frustration. Same in my teenage years. it's a potent result that comes from feeling withdrawn yet intensely angry at oneself on a daily basis. No point wondering what if, especially when it comes to my education because after all I did rather well.
2 - The most useful point made was 'you cannot make a hearing child out of a deaf child.' Maybe if I'd been surrounded by positive, instead of equally angry and disenchanted deaf children, I might have developed healthier coping strategies and not been so humiliated by having to ask people to repeat themselves. I still don't. That's stupid, I know. The small parts of a sentence can be filled in by the context so usually I'm ok... but that's not really hearing is it? That's joining the dots.
4 - Heh heh heh at the parents trying to understand each other with those moulds. Like Peter and me first thing in the morning except I'm able to lipread him confidently, which they neglected to mention as a strategy.
5 - Cannot begin to describe how much I disliked the signers, yes I respect their right to a language and have no problems with that. What I have a problem with is their construction and defence of 'Deaf culture' as though it is embedded in anyone with a hearing problem. It's not a culture in my view, more a community of individuals that understandably gravitate towards each other because of their shared communication and background issues. I think it's extremely offensive to label anyone, especially a mother, as an abuser for wanting their child to hear and thrive. Pah. Maybe this is where my issue comes from. I don't actually identify as deaf in any way shape or form.
6 - Were we meant to hear any of the sounds during the hearing tests... I didn't hear any of them.... hilarious.
5 - The cochlear implant section of the programme scared me a lot. I like my music. I love hearing everything from Moby to NIN, I especially like dancing like a loon to such wonders as Bounce... or Fire. To think that it would all be reduced to a dalek-like mess really worries me.
6 - The switch on....hmmmm. I think I'll wait and see how he's doing a few months down the line.
7 - Overall though, thought provoking and well balanced - food for thought and a non patronising view on a condition that can royally bugger things up. Which means that unlike the Deaf community I think this: 'if it's broke, FIX IT.'
Toodle-pip!
Bounce...
Fire....
Trent is a god.
Link to programme
So, I watched the above programme this morning and found it very thought provoking. I'll just put up a load of bullet points as my thoughts are rather sleep deprived at the moment!
1 - The most telling part of the programme for me was when her daughter got up and left the signing session, went and sat down and stuck her head in her hands. Guessing she really didn't enjoy having something shoved in her face and being confronted with someone who communicates in a way that is totally unfamiliar and scary. That made me think "hang on, she's not stupid, she knows she struggles" - and so when Rita met with the mother who explained about communication breakdowns it clicked into place. The little girl, at the age of five, has already developed a front - glossing over misunderstandings and distracting people with her 'all singing all dancing' nature. I think it was a shock for her mum to realise this. How sad to think that they couldn't see, but then the hearing mum they met put it well when she said 'if they talk, they're fine' as a common misconception.
2 - Totally empathised with the daughter's tiredness - I used to fall asleep after school regularly such was the exhaustion of having to focus and having those annoying TAs telling me to 'listen,' or 'you're not listening, look at the teacher.' Merde. The tantrums, also a feature of my childhood, I think I was a very angry child - always railing against the world in frustration. Same in my teenage years. it's a potent result that comes from feeling withdrawn yet intensely angry at oneself on a daily basis. No point wondering what if, especially when it comes to my education because after all I did rather well.
2 - The most useful point made was 'you cannot make a hearing child out of a deaf child.' Maybe if I'd been surrounded by positive, instead of equally angry and disenchanted deaf children, I might have developed healthier coping strategies and not been so humiliated by having to ask people to repeat themselves. I still don't. That's stupid, I know. The small parts of a sentence can be filled in by the context so usually I'm ok... but that's not really hearing is it? That's joining the dots.
4 - Heh heh heh at the parents trying to understand each other with those moulds. Like Peter and me first thing in the morning except I'm able to lipread him confidently, which they neglected to mention as a strategy.
5 - Cannot begin to describe how much I disliked the signers, yes I respect their right to a language and have no problems with that. What I have a problem with is their construction and defence of 'Deaf culture' as though it is embedded in anyone with a hearing problem. It's not a culture in my view, more a community of individuals that understandably gravitate towards each other because of their shared communication and background issues. I think it's extremely offensive to label anyone, especially a mother, as an abuser for wanting their child to hear and thrive. Pah. Maybe this is where my issue comes from. I don't actually identify as deaf in any way shape or form.
6 - Were we meant to hear any of the sounds during the hearing tests... I didn't hear any of them.... hilarious.
5 - The cochlear implant section of the programme scared me a lot. I like my music. I love hearing everything from Moby to NIN, I especially like dancing like a loon to such wonders as Bounce... or Fire. To think that it would all be reduced to a dalek-like mess really worries me.
6 - The switch on....hmmmm. I think I'll wait and see how he's doing a few months down the line.
7 - Overall though, thought provoking and well balanced - food for thought and a non patronising view on a condition that can royally bugger things up. Which means that unlike the Deaf community I think this: 'if it's broke, FIX IT.'
Toodle-pip!
Bounce...
Fire....
Trent is a god.
This was a very interesting programme for me, but like yourself quite a few points I didn't agree with.
ReplyDeletei love your views i to was deaf in childhood - so true - i relate to tireness as a child and frustrations but the child will find her right path later when shes ready - i think also rita was naurally trying to be like any parent would - youd want the best for ur child - the danger here is that she thinks c i are a cure they indeed are not - ahh well - lots of talking in deaf world going on abt this subject - my view is this we are all different -unique and individuals - and a small minority of deaf world oppose it becuase they dont know what they are missing - someone like me whom had hearing prior knows too well what is missing and loving every minute of my ci - ist better not perfect - not a cure but supporting me in each and every way x
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